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I woke up Tuesday morning (my birthday) to the sound of my iPhone dinging. Seems a couple of people due to arrive that day had missed their flight, and were texting me to let me know that they would attempt to catch the next flight to Vegas and to sit tight. I got up, and Colleen was still asleep and it was pretty early, so I decided that a great birthday gift to myself would be to go work out. I went to the fitness room and spent some time on a stationary bike and then ran about a mile and a half on a treadmill and returned to the room. I got back and showered and woke the wife and we dressed and met up with everyone to eat breakfast. We ate at the inappropriately named “The Coffee Shop” inside of TI. I say inappropriately named because the coffee was just drip and terrible. No lattes, cappucinos, nothing. The food was pretty good, though. By the time we were finished eating, the stragglers arrived from the airport, having managed to make the next flight. They dropped their stuff in our room, and we hiked across the street to the monorail station and headed over to the Las Vegas Hilton, home of Star Trek: The Experience and where I wanted to spend my birthday.

We got there about fifteen minutes before they opened, and got in the line to buy tickets to the attractions. We got a package deal which included The Klingon Encounter, Borg 4D, pictures on the bridge and in the Borg chamber, and a backstage tour. I waited impatiently for everyone to buy their tickets, and was very excited. When we were finally ready to go through, we presented our tickets to a lady who looked at me and shook her head a little.

She said, “I’ve worked here for ten years. I’ve admitted Klingons who refused to speak English. I’ve seen families of Andorians including infants — PAINTED BLUE. I’ve seen it all. I have never seen anyone as excited to be here as you are.” Best. Compliment. Ever.

We went through and did the two rides, and then stopped for a quick appetizer and drink in Quark’s Bar before the backstage tour.  We went on the tour where we learned all kinds of interesting secrets about the attraction, and then had our pictures taken.  Exhausted, as by this time we’d spent a good five hours Experiencing Star Trek, we sat down in Quark’s Bar for actual food and even more actual booze.

My geekdom sated, we made our way back to the hotel and drank even more in Kahunaville that night.

We got to the airport at dark-thirty Monday morning, and, because we had PAPER TICKETS (which we bartered for with chickens and marked their sale on a clay tablet) we had to wait in Southwest’s long line to exchange them for paper boarding passes per the TSA.  The security line was really long, which is to be expected for a Monday morning and then we all sat down together to eat breakfast.  Some of us opted for boring old breakfast tacos, while others of us opted for the ingenious Mangia breakfast pizza.  Instead of pizza sauce, they use frickin GRAVY.  It was devine.  We got on the plane and split up into our respective middle seats.  Yay.  The flight was uneventful, which is my favorite kind of flight.

We arrived, grabbed our bags, and hopped a shuttle over to Treasure Island, which was now known as TI, and had been almost complete de-pirate-ized.  That makes me sad.  You’d think with Johnny Depp’s latest string of blockbusters, they’d be more into the whole theme.  We lined up at the buffet for second breakfast (the most important breakfast of the day), and April scampered off to her room, looking a little green.  We ate, and then retired to our rooms for a nap.

Colleen and I went down to the pool for a bit after our nap, then we met up with everyone (including a recovered April) for dinner at Kahunaville, a restaurant/bar which was very tasty.  Everyone but Colleen and I had gotten tickets to see Mystéré, so off they went, and we waited in the bar to meet up with Dawn, a friend of mine from high school who now lives in Vegas.  She and her husband took us to dinner down the way at Palm Steak House in Caesar’s Palace (YUM!) and we met some of their friends.  After the show, Shane and April joined us and William (Dawn’s Hubby) drove us to a club where they comped our entry cause it was almost my birthday.  We drank too much and had lots of fun, and then took a cab back to the hotel and passed out.

Just got home from a week in Vegas with some of our very best friends. We missed everyone who wasn’t there, but we had a blast. There is a ton to blog about, and I’ll get it done this week, as pictures are circulated, I’ll be sure to post them here. In short, we drank too much, ate too much, gambled too much, saw too many shows, sat in the hot tub way too long, and definitely overstayed our welcome at Star Trek: The Experience. We have set the bar very very high for great awesome vacations.

When you’re walking five to seven miles daily in a theme park, you need a lot of fluids.  Even when you need a lot of fluids and consume a lot of fluids, certain fluid-related body functions speed up, and you find yourself visiting the many lovely restrooms available to you.  I found myself at Epcot in the World Showcase in the evening, and decided to make a quick run to the restroom in Norway.ÂAlmost all the urinals were occupied, so I stepped up to a vacant one, unzipped, and began to answer nature’s urgent call.  There were about 6 other men engaged in similar activity.  One of them had a six-year-old son/nephew/grandson/kidnapee waiting for him behind us. As it is inappropriate to relieve gaseous pressures in mixed company (even in DisneyWorld), one of my peers noisily made more room. The six-year-old behind us began giggling uncontrollably.  Well, I thought, there is no better time to do this, and besides, it’ll make the kid’s whole day if I follow up that other guy’s butt-trumpet with my own.  I also cut loose.  Apparently, I wasn’t the only one with that thought, as five other gentlemen also picked that very moment to entertain the youth.   The malodorous symphony we played for him sent him into gales of bellyaching laughter, which caused most of us to titter uncomfortably as we suddenly realized we had pressing engagements elsewhere.  As I painstakingly avoided eye contact with the rest of the orchestra and got outta there, I couldn’t help thinking that the six of us had just made a little boy’s special Disney Wish come true.

We’re back from the Mouse House, and much fun was had by all.  I have a few new interesting stories, some of which I’ll be blogging in the coming days.  During the trip, we decided that the word “Sherbet” instead of being pronounced in either of its ambiguous ways (sher-bert or sher-butt) should instead be pronounced “Sher-bay” to rhyme with “sorbet”.  The ladies in our group intend on going to Tahiti for some reason or other, and we all agreed that Sidewalk Sauce was NOT something one wants on one’s pants.  I’ll leave you to wonder about the Tasty, Tasty Garbage Juice.

Very glad to be home, but had MUCH MUCH fun. (And didn’t TOTALLY blow my diet. )

It’s now T-Minus 8 days til I hop on a plane to see Princess Jasmine herself in Disney World.  Oh, and I get to spend lots and lots of time with my favorite niece and favorite nephew, in-laws, out-laws, by-laws, and wife.  I’m really looking forward to it all.  Yay vacation!